Well, I could sure use a drink right now, do you think that would help somehow?

(This blog is from my first night in Ireland)

It is 2am here as I write this. I haven't really been able to sleep, although I am completely exhausted. I don't want to complain a ton, but I am currently miserable. I can barely swallow and my throat hurts incessantly. I missed dinner somehow last night after not having eaten all day, luckily there is a student store but that is just more money I had to spend that I don't have. The internet won't work. I want to scream or punch a wall. I feel completely disconnected from everything I know and am constantly fending off tears. I met a few other international students yesterday, but they all came here with one another and as I did not yet have a phone, no way to contact anyone. I have yet to unpack as after my shopping yesterday I barely had the energy to even put sheets on my bed. The only person I met yesterday was this man on the bus who was rather helpful at first but then completely over-extended his welcome, and was really difficult to ditch. As I didn't know where I was or where I was going, I couldn't very well just hop off the bus before him and hope for the best. His over insistence that he "just walk me to the mobile shop and then we can go about getting your other things", and him making jokes about Americans the entire time made me really uncomfortable but what was I supposed to do? Everything here is more expensive, and even if it seems cheaper (2 Euro!) I have realize I am actually spending close to 4 with the exchange rate. Most of the students are still on break, and I can't tell if there is anyone else on my hall or not. I have a phone, and I was hoping to call home, but I don't know the country code and without internet I can't look it up. I have no idea what I am supposed to do with myself for the next few days, or how I will ever make any friends. If you were to fly a helicopter down to my dorm room and tell me I could go home right now, I'd be saying Hello, Seattle before you know it. I'm sure things will look up soon but right now I just don't know what to do. And it is so much worse because I thought I was going to be so fine and brave and now I am just a hot mess. I have been trying to sleep now for a few hours and it is all I want to do but my mind is racing, and every time it calms down enough that I think I'm close to sleep, my coughing begins again and I am wide awake once more. :(

This is the chaos that was my room for the first day and a half

I would say that this is a pretty good representation of how I felt when writing this blog